WALK BESIDE ME AND BE MY FRIEND

Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow.Don't walk behind me; I may not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend.

-Albert Camus

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Let me tell you this tiny story.

Things were getting into high gear as teachers and students alike were preparing for the big day. Yet Mari was sitting by myself in the auditorium staring into space away from it all, her friends were out on the campus grounds rehearsing. Her mind was set on not joining in the graduation rites the following week as she didn’t know if she could get over her disappointment thus she chose to be alone in her misery.

‘Penny for your thoughts’ Bernie spoke as she plopped down beside Mari who didn’t see her coming. Bernie was short for Bernadette. Mari didn’t reply nor looked at her.

‘I know how you feel.’ She continued. ‘Okay, He cheated in the finals; everybody knows that. And the teachers unfairly and wrongfully, out of respect for their colleague, his father, looked the other way. Apparently it was his dad who leaked out the paper. And now his son the jerk is declared valedictorian, a prize which belongs to you. Our friends know that too.’

‘But you know what -- he’ll always be cheating for the rest of his life. That makes him one big loser no matter how you look at it. While you if you beat this will be moving on to bigger challenges and will beat it just as well with flying colors. That makes you a winner in every aspect of life’s game. That sure is unbeatable in anybody’s book, especially in mine!’ and she smiled her usual lopsided smile.

‘C’mon, let’s join the practice - ‘Will race yah!’

 

Mari wiped her tears, jumped up, and ran after her chum. ‘Not if I beat you first!!!’

End of story.

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We get many kinds of friends in our lifetime – irregular friend, occasional friend, absentee friend, fair weather friend, business friend, college friend, career friend, professional friend, online friend, and many more. Friends too may be simply passing through, stay awhile, be fleeting, or perhaps remain with us much longer but definitely they can’t stay on forever. All these affect us in many different ways. Friends undoubtedly shape our lives and our responses to it by their mere presence. Some wield influence too making our lives better or worse by it.

Many summers come and go along with people who have filled it with joy, fun, and laughter. But almost all of them have faded away with the years, hasn’t it? Not by anyone’s fault but simply because that’s the way life is. Everything comes and goes just like time does.

I value friends and friendships. I do not belittle every effort big or small by anyone. Such effort, I believe, is a display of character and soul. The fact that a person goes outside of himself to offer his hand in friendship is truly incredible. It is a selfless gesture or act because he thinks nothing of the possibility of being ignored or rejected or snubbed. That possibility is real, you know. Many of us sometimes don’t know how to handle friendships or its offer. I could guess that maybe it’s the fear of getting so close to a person – the fear of having a stranger get to know you better, flaws and all – the fear of getting hurt by failed expectations, yours and the other person’s -- the fear of baring your soul to another.

But if we dwell on those fears, we will indisputably miss out on a lot of good things which real genuine friendship can bring – the courage strength hope and inspiration lent us to carry on through life’s trials, the beauty of nature and life which a friend would point out to us and which we would have missed if he didn’t, the fun and camaraderie of togetherness, the dogged loyalty to stand by you through thick and thin against popular opinion, his wisdom in speaking up when needed or in keeping his mouth shut when all that you need is affection and comfort. Such are the treasures and tons more (others could add to that list) which good friendships can undeniably bring.

Come, won’t you walk beside me and be my friend. :-)