EVERYTHING YOU GO THROUGH, GROWS YOU

 

 

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A friend asked me this question.............. 'What do you do when bad happens to you?' .I looked at her and said.. 'You've been hurt bad?' .. 'Hey, I'm doing the asking here.' she retorted in jest.
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As every person is a story you can be very sure that hurt and pain along with other things complete a person's personal history. Each bit did its part to shape the person for better or for worse and this definitely will impact people who come close to the territory or happen to be near it or get drawn to it by some unexplained circumstance. People collide with one another by some mysterious force but its reason not fully or always understood. Not yet anyway. This human collision does get us bruised.. battered... shaken up... wounded and scarred. Unhappy memories are then created which sadly can still prick even long after the experience is gone. Some may say forgiven, but many more will say not forgotten.
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Bad can hurt. We all know it as it comes to us in many different forms, ways, means, intensity, appearances, reason or intent, sometimes unintended, sometimes disguised, but with the sole purpose of hurting us and turning our world upside down--- rewriting our story in its entirety or in part. It doesn't draw a pretty picture, particularly if you can see it in the heart --- torn, tattered, messed up, beaten, weary.
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It made me think ......
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Maybe there is no answer. Maybe one just lives through the experience..... try to respond to it in the best manner possible..... draw strength where strength can be found from within or from without..... become the change which is eventually going to happen anyway like it or not. But something within, something bigger than yourself, makes you want to try to transform this experience into a treasure - your treasure - that would matter for a very, very long time. For you... for your life... Because, truth is, you owe it to yourself to do just that.
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My friend threw me that question but I think she didn't expect an answer. The answer which, I believe, she wasn't seeking but one which she already knew ------ Bad has its way of making us grow.

THINGS CAN EITHER MAKE OR BREAK YOU - BUT IT ALL DEPENDS ON YOU

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Look hard into your day because you just might find or get your gold. I can say that because, more often than not, I truly find my inspiration which immensely feed the writing each time each day.
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Like this quote which I saw this morning.............. "Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny." -- C.S. Lewis
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Don't you think this quote is the story of most everybody's life?
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Hardships .. it befalls each one of us ordinary people in our ordinary lives in our ordinary days. That's as old as the ancient ruins of Greece... as old as time. It comes to us in different shapes, sizes, predicament, inconvenience, discomfort and it minds not whether we like it or not. It just goes ahead and does what it does best... hurt us.
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That can be a big ouch or a small one and a pain in the butt (pardon the expression) or a heartache. You will groan, whine, hiss, complain, bang your head against the wall, kick the furniture and end up with a broken leg, cry oceans of tears to drown yourself in, or jump from the highest mountain but you wouldn't because, as you stop to think, that can hurt bigger than your whining. Besides the tallest mountains are in Pampanga, Batangas, or Tagaytay and before you can reach your destination miles and hours away you would have met your future love in the bus you're riding and so together head back home for a nice date! Or get married! Destiny! End of story.
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The nicest part though (not just meeting the love of your life) is having the power to turn things around to your advantage or favor. Yes, you are far more stronger than you think you are.
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But... that would depend on your responses to your situation. The situation can either make or break you.... but it all depends on you! Really, it all depends on you.
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You know the drill..... work harder, take positive attitude and action, push yourself to greatness, be creative and resourceful, hope bigger, pray harder, think-think-think, be fearless, seek the counsel of the wise, be mentored in the right direction, persevere, believe in your own strengths, build on who you are and what you have. Remind yourself not to let your hardships define you but rather to let it shape you into your biggest and brightest potential.
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That may sound tough but truth is.... you're tougher than tough. That is by God's design.
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May God bless you with the wisdom to see yourself as He designed you to be.... His obra maestra!

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God bless you.

 

WHAT YOU DO WITH PAIN RATHER THAN WHAT IT DOES TO YOU IS FAR MORE ESSENTIAL

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An online friend once remarked in jest.... 'You smile to the world like you never knew pain. What a good life you must have.'
That's farthest from the truth; simply absurd. But if you don't mind I will consider that as a compliment though. You don't get to hear something like that everyday! So thank you, just the same.

As it's been said 'everybody has a story and is a story', right? I'm not different because I also have my story.

But I don't do Facebook to tell my story. It has its own place and time. A public place such as this is definitely not that place and time.

Pain. Now that is among the most spoken of or written about word in every history. It's experienced by every living thing, two-legged or four-legged, on our planet. Pain comes in many ways, in different seasons or time, for a diversity of reasons or causes, and in different shapes, forms, or sizes. 

It holds tightly in its grip the whole range of human existence..... the emotions, intellect, spiritual, physical, social, and every interaction feasible to our existence. Am I saying where there is interaction there will be pain, too? Following the principle of cause and effect, I'm saying possibly yes. Pain is an effect (one of several others more) caused by something or someone or sometimes even by the self. 

What do we do with pain? As we see it in people around us or in our own lives we either react to it ...or respond to it... as in fight it or take flight far away from it. 

I have learned through the years that.....'Reacting' could maybe make us even more miserable as it's done with the absence of thought. 'Responding', in effect, could take us to a higher plane of understanding and growth. 'Fighting' it could achieve for us strength of character... while 'taking flight' makes us even weaker in mind, heart, and spirit. 

Pain simply sits alongside its buddies... hurt, sadness, loneliness, frustration, disappointment, bitterness, depression, resentment, discouragement, confusion, and its other members of the same negative pack. They may seem or mean to break you but it can't succeed when you don't let them. They can't hurt you when you won't give them consent to do so.

Therefore, It can be said that what you do with pain (and its friends) rather than what it does to you is that which matters most, in any language. You define you. Nobody else will or can do that for you. 'Life is what you make it', so said a wise person.

And I would like to add....
Let your heart smile through all of life. There's always some reason to smile.

Blessings from above to everybody!

ALL FOR A GOOD REASON --- YOU

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'Everything happens for a reason.' -- I have heard that spoken and written about for hundreds of times then and now.

When fortunes crumble, relationships disintegrate, dreams melt away, or hopes get snuffed out just like that....  they say it must be for some reason. But even to the wisest of men its reason or reasons may not be known right away, except for those already visible to the eye. Oddly its true understanding enlightenment or explanation would come much much later when the dust would have already settled down, so to speak. A dear friend, who I will always remember, said this .. 'Wait and you will know.'
 
I  have always thought that waiting would be too late. Because the hurt, pain, disappointment, frustration, sadness, sorrow experienced would have already taken its heavy toll and leave deep scars both in the mind and heart.... and to the body as well as anxiety would have worn it down, too. All seemingly beyond repair. Or so it all seemed.

But my friend insisted... 'Wait and you will know.'

To cut a long story short, I did wait.

Time took over.

And one by one the reason or reasons unfolded itself to me. Amazingly.

I have learned....  It is when one has learned to receive peace, learned to forgive, learned to adjust one's sails on the turbulent seas of life, grown by leaps and bounds in maturity, gained a better self-worth, and seen the world and its people for its myriad of flaws and imperfections that one is able to see... truly see beyond all of that pain and hurt. And finally begin to understand the why's of it all. And best of all learn even more.. so much more. To be healed and joy be restored abundantly is its reward.

Everything happens for a reason. Definitely it's for a good reason --- You! By God's design. 
Be kind to yourself; wait where the waiting should.
Don't lose your smile. God will make the waiting worthwhile.
Blessings, everyone!

YOU MAY HURT BUT YOU WILL ALSO GAIN

Sitting here by my nice couch which is about a year old now brought home by my youngest daughter who meant to surprise me then. And I was and I loved it. Well, today seems to be a rather slow day as the summer sun beats down heavily outside my window and yet eased up a bit by winds that blow here and there. That's a lovely sight seeing the leaves swaying on tree tops fanning the air. Maybe Mr. Rain will come visiting later in the day as it did yesterday. With that perhaps summer may be drawing to its close very soon.

I'm quite comfy here on the couch. But I know too that soon I would be getting off it and get back to my battles with life, so to speak. Yesterday I battled with a hectic day packed with things that superimposed on each other or were quite close on each other's heel... too close for comfort. Naturally such a situation would result in a bucket of stress.. or maybe buckets. But I would not go into details anymore because it's the usual normal things that eat up a person's day or life. What would be worth noting though is that the stresses were all for naught because things ended up well.. in fact way beyond expectation thus making everybody happy. All's well that ends well, as often said. Somebody up there must be smiling.

We go through a lot like that, some bigger and some much worse which get us hurt bashed and pushed to our limits. Often makes us think if there was some other way to live life and not have to go through such hell over and over again.

But we know the answer to that, don't we? There's none. Cause if there was -- then there would be gazillions on that side of the globe rocking this old world of ours or maybe causing it to spin widely in space. So don't waste time searching for utopia because it's only in the mind where it has always been anyway.

So then here we are battling our battles day after day. And we get hurt a lot in the process. But that's okay too. Because in every hurt, in every pain, in every tear --- rises courage, strength, faith, perseverance, understanding, determination, hope, and essentially joy. Oh yes, joy -- it comes like the sun comes -- brightly shining after a heavy rain!

This puts to mind a wonderful quote sent by a good friend.....

"But do not fear to live or love,
Life's not exempt from pain.
So pick a rose, you may get hurt,
But you will also gain!"

YOUR SMALL CAN MEAN THE WORLD TO ANOTHER

Our world is a hurting world - its people hurting suffering struggling with so many demons real or imagined. That's us. Oh yes, we try to be strong and brave -- most times succeeding. But at the end of the day in the middle of the night, we cringe under our sheets in our cold beds fearful of the coming dawn.. afraid for what it can do to hurt us again and again.

Scary but real. We all have to wrestle with a myriad of troubles, issues, and challenges, none exempted. We have our troubles and it comes as diverse as pebbles of sand. Some of us have it in manageable terms while others simply cruise down the bumps with undeniable ease. A good number battle it out with fangs and claws as would a female tiger when her brood is imperiled by an enemy. As some others more would simply sulk away lost and defeated. Problems are like huge great weights resting on our small frail shoulders and can easily crush us forlorn and defeated down to the ground.

At this broken point we desperately look out and up from our troubles for something or someone to take our hand and help us up on our feet again. Lucky if some permanent answers would come along with it thus ending our misery and we get to move on with smiles restored on our faces.

If you know someone like that.. right there where you are, give your hand and help him up. When a friend knocks at your door carrying his cross, let him in and give him rest from his burden. When a colleague comes to your desk with eyes close to tears, drop what you're doing and listen. When you see your mother quietly sitting in a corner forlornly, go to her and give her reason to smile. When your child comes to you with a broken toy in the middle of your reports, hug your child and fix that toy. When the maid asks for a leave to run to her ailing parent, grant it without any moment's hesitation or rebuke. When someone in your neighborhood comes to you for a small loan to buy medicines for her sick child, give even if that money was supposed to be for a nice dress you saw at the mall yesterday.

Small things - yes. But you'll never know how much it means to that person.

Someone kind and gentle said this....

"The next time someone needs you ... just be there. Stay."

I HAVE LEARNED THAT.... Part 4

I have learned that when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

Okay so that person has hurt you or robbed you of what you think is rightfully yours. If I told you that that does not count, it does not count for a reason to strike back at the other person – that wanting to get even may hurt him yes and which will make you in turn very happy bout it too yes again. But truth of the matter is – you’re the one who’ll be hurting most by it. Why? --Because you are making yourself quite open or vulnerable for a counter-strike again and again. You are giving him permission to hurt you repeatedly because apparently he won’t just sit there taking your punches too but will punch you right back in – cause he is the type who would. And you know what, in always thinking about your rage it would only serve to enrage you some more. That’s even hurting you more than you ever know. Your own rage will destroy you. So you see the other guy is winning over you without even trying hard enough.

But think about this --- can he be so sure that what he has stolen from you is the thing for him that it would work well for him too? You see, wanting something just because it looks good on the other person does not guarantee that the same thing would look good or will work well for you too. Nope, that’s not how it works. One man’s medicine may be poison for another.

So what to do? Well, leave! Your leaving will douse cold water over his fiery temper and greed. How can he be continually angry too when there’s nobody around to be angry with or at? There’s nobody or nothing that would add coal to the fire in the furnace…his furnace.

And what have you lost? If you seriously think about it, not much really because you can always get it back into your life again just the way you are. That's how you have succeeded in the first place.