THE HABIT OF VERY SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE

A nephew online asked me this question --- " Tita (aunt), so what's the habit of very successful people?" --

The answer? --- It's being able to get up every time you fall.

Everybody has a dream tucked up somewhere there in the mind and heart. Big dreams, small dreams, big goals, small goals, big ambitions, small ambitions. It's all beautiful. Don't let anyone tell you that it's just a waste of time because there's no guarantee that you may get it or even come close, or so they think. Although I could agree on that 'no guarantee' bit because indeed there's plenty of obstacles or hurdles to conquer, sometimes can be quite overwhelming and might make you want to give up, and the unpleasant unexpected can rear its ugly head down the road... thus may affect decisions or actions. But we've read a lot bout other people's success stories, haven't we, and do know what the common denominator was or is --- It's being able to get up every time you fall.

Thomas Edison failed a thousand times. I'm not saying we would. What am saying is he tried a thousand times before finally coming to one that really worked. In essence that is what will happen with the rest of us... stumble and fall 10 maybe 20 times to say the least, but we're expected to pick ourselves up 10 or 20 times too and start all over again -- and perhaps for another round maybe of falling and getting up again. But get up we must. That's the trick that gets the dream.

The same trick that would get you your dream job or position, career or profession, medals, awards, titles, recognition. Name it, you can have it. Use the trick. ------------

Somebody said this, to quote.....

"The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience." Unquote.

COURAGE IS A QUIET VOICE SOMETIMES

------ Who hasn't passed through tough times? Maybe someone out there is going through one right now. Hard as it may be to listen to family and good friends' well-meaning efforts to help you... lending their own faith, strength and courage, it still behooves you to listen and listen well. When in the midst of pain we can't usually think straight. So we need others to think for us. Oh yes, sometimes we need to do that. We should learn to borrow their minds in lieu of our fuzzy brains. They say that it's easier to size things up when you're outside the issue and being objective about it. That's what they can do for you. At least listen.

That being said, we know that Life is tough. God himself said that but He did promise that He would be with us through it all. So understanding that very well will help you deal with life's challenges in better form. You will begin to find the courage you thought no longer existed. But wait a sec, don't expect courage to come blazing away a clear smooth path for you to tread on. It doesn't usually happen that way. Sometimes courage comes in so quietly you'd miss it if you weren't paying close attention. Sometimes it's just a small voice inside nudging you to try one more time. Try one more time, one more hope, one more faith, one more prayer, one more day. ----------

TO COMPLETE OR COMPLEMENT ANOTHER

Was reading this book sometime back (Insignificant one, by a not yet famous writer who could be one day. Who can tell.) and one line struck me, spoken by one female character 'I love you because you complete me.' Nice huh? Aww so romantic..

But I don't buy that. What if something happened and the relationship went pfft and the fella went off to Alaska or to the moon or ran off with another girl... then what does that make of you? That makes you incomplete? Meaning you can no longer function as a normal human being without him? That you become less than whole because a part of you is with the other? Oh okay, maybe I'm taking that quite literally but kidding aside am just stressing a point. Because I think that's not a good line to use.. even if it were simply meant to tickle a lovestruck heart, yours or the other's.

Have you ever thought about this... that You can't let or allow anyone to define you or your life for whatever reason, not even for love. Dependence on another is okay to a certain extent maybe but certainly not when it takes away a part of you or even just a teeny weeny bit of you, or so you romantically think.

Complete may not be the right word here. Because complete may indeed fill up a void but it's not necessarily by or with love. Rather try using the word complement. Complement does not take away; rather it adds itself to another in such a loving understanding magnanimous manner, capacity and intent.

Someone said this, to quote.....

"Never say that someone completes you. We have to feel whole even when we are by ourselves, for needing a person is not love but dependency. Wanting a person to become a part of your life is the best reason for having them. So rather than search for the someone who will complete you, wait for the person that will complement your completeness." Unquote.

LISTENING and SILENCE

This is interesting >>>> "The word LISTEN contains the same letters as the word SILENT." (Anon.)

Listening and silence are two words which we seem to be quite incapable of doing. Well, more often than not, it seems. It is like we need a lot of noise or busyness or activity or distractions around us to function. But.. What is wrong with silence.. isn't it just the perfect setting to come to terms with self and to make sense of the world outside? To get to the core of things one needs to peel off the frills and unnecessary superficial layers that hide the truth or gems within. And noise does a very good job of blocking from us what we should be seeing in truth and honesty.

Silence too makes listening possible and easier. And maybe that's why both contain the same letters because they are twin siblings hard to take apart. One can't exist without the other. -------

HAPPINESS FROM WITHIN

A dear ole friend at lunch asked me this --- "I'm not happy. Are you?"

Are you happy? A question asked of anybody everybody at one time or another. So we get lots of answers to that from friends, people, books, videos, music, movies. We try to provide our own answers too. That usually helps us coast along through our days or on the other hand leave us even more confused and weary.

Well, I have learned through my own life journey that happiness of the good kind does not come from outside of your turf. Rather it's right there in your hand... waiting to be created nurtured expanded enlarged and blazing out to the bigger world outside if you let it. In short, you draw from within and not without if you want to be happy. You'll struggle with that, of course, because humans (that's you and me and others) have this myopic penchant for misery, rather selfish if you look hard at it. Misery attracts attention and humans love attention, of any kind. We're babies pretending to be adults.

So to be happy, you have to be quite creative at it. You like flowers, so don't wait for someone to bring you a bouquet or an occasion to buy some. Get them from the flower shop. You love peace and quiet, so go find a space in the house where you can sit or read a book without interruption. You love nature, so go for an early morning walk and commune with the lovely sunrise, chirping birds, and a gentle breeze on your face. Or take out your canvass and brush and paint it. You love coffee, so go fix yourself one - bring it to the table and sip slowly feeling the warmth embrace your whole being.

Happiness are the moments that take your breath away.

FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY

I like this quote; saw it just today >>>

"Don't try to figure out what other people want to hear from you; figure out what you have to say. It's the one and only thing you have to offer." -- Barbara Kingslover

Reminds me of someone who said to me months ago.....'Huy, mahirap mag-facebook o blog, kelangan smart ka at sasakay ka sa trend dito.' - (Not easy doing blogs or facebook. You've got to be smart and ride on its trend bandwagon.)

Yah think?? Whatever one says here, I believe, comes from one's history and that makes sense. A person thinks-speaks-acts according to, dictated by, and gathered from his past - his personal history and experience - observations insights and beliefs - which shaped and continually shapes him. Everybody has a story to tell. Be it light, heavy, sad, scary, silly, naughty or nice. Everybody has something to say. You've got to be your own authentic self. What is essential perhaps is to learn how to say it right... so that people don't walk away embarrassed, disgusted, offended, belittled, diminished or turned off by your piece. But instead will stop stay and listen to your stories of true joy, faith, hope, love, courage, comradeship, learning, positivity and inspiration.

The world has enough wars to keep it busy. We don't need to add up to those things which only serve to destroy peace and harmony, within and without. The rule of the universe is not to tear people down but rather to build them up. You alone can best figure out how.

A LIFE TO THE FULLEST

Why do we chain themselves to old worn mind sets, of severe thoughts that serve only to cramp our style and enjoyment of a full life. And you may ask 'what is meant by a full life?'

-- Simple. It only means that we see and acknowledge our blessings, recognize its Giver, realize our God-given spark, know and still like who we are and where we are at. Because as difficult as that may sound, that's what God intended our life to be. May not be a perfect life but it's ours. We and all that we stand for is the vehicle by which we grow, learn and become the person God meant us to be. That's what we're supposed to do. And it's there so that we may live life to the fullest.

WHAT MORE CAN I DO?

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." ---- Oliver Wendell Holmes

I used to bother about what had gone past and what was yet to come. The questions always fell on 'was it good the year that passed?' or 'what's up ahead in the future for me?'

Then I learned that... i was asking the wrong questions. I should be asking myself instead... 'what more can I do?' When you get satisfactory answers to that, then you can rest easy that it was indeed a good year that has gone by... and ...that future which you seek will be right there for you. You don't have to look elsewhere, it's all inside of you to create the life you want for yourself. God didn't create losers but winners who shine both within and out to the waiting world outside. Now let's make God proud.

Okay, "what more can I do?" Here's my tiny bit... at 64 - widow, mother, sister, friend, and others more God has lined up for me to do. :-)

As you may already know I do landscape sketches with pencil, some posted here in the blog. But have long toyed with the idea of painting in water color, just for the fun of it. Have never tried that before, after all have had no training whatsoever for the art; but it always had been a dream. 'Been drawing since I was a kid but that isn't a guaranty (as most in the know would say) that something on a bigger scale other than a sketchpad would come out fairly nice or a wee bit closer to that in the least.

So a few days ago, at the insistent prodding of my youngest daughter (like I said our children know us better than most people do..), 'took out the canvass 12"x14" (she always has a supply of one or two on stand-by for her occasional dabbling at the art) and borrowed her water color set, placed the canvass on the computer table leaning on the monitor, sat on the computer chair... and began!

Well, not quite immediately. First had to have an image of what to paint. And nature was and has always been the first choice for the drawings made.... and again this time. Remembered that one wallpaper on the desktop which was simply so pretty. Well, to make a long story short... here's a beginner's first honest step in water color painting :-) Am tip-toeing on this one.. Lols!

And my tribute to 'what more can I do'. And this I can truly say, 'have enjoyed myself immensely; 'had lots of fun with it. I guess that's what truly matters. A big bonus if that makes God smile too. Lols!

Hope to hear 'bout your own experience soon. :-) .. crocheting, knitting, cooking, biking, trekking, writing a book -- anyone??

DWELL NOT UPON THY WEARINESS...

"Dwell not upon thy weariness, thy strength shall be according to the measure of thy desire."-- Arab proverb

One dreary morning not so far back was one dreary morning I won't ever forget. Why? Because this was when I felt like so totally drained.. exhausted.. spent.. tired.. weary -- like I've never felt before. The reason? Something. Everything. It felt like saying 'I give up' 'This is it. Enough!'. So what was I angry at? or of? Plenty. Plenty that spelled life. And when I shared this with my best friend, she too ranted away with her own woes blues and weariness... and literally flung her hands up above her head in utter exasperation and what seemed to be... surrender and defeat.

You know, sometimes one just has to see oneself mirrored in another person to be jolted out of something unpleasant, to put it mildly. That was a big jolt indeed. I was grateful it came when it did.

"Okay, enough of that drama. Snap out of it cos there's work to be done." I said to her.
"What??!" she snapped back. Well, undoubtedly she was the drama queen in our group.
"Yeah! We need some working on ourselves. And we're starting now." I countered decisively.

That's right. When you feel so down and out, when things get so large and overwhelmingly makes you feel so helpless and small... that's the time to get up - shake the dust off - and get back into the ring again... and punch back hard and much harder. It's important to snap out of it pronto, resist the temptation to dwell on your misery because that only serves to double up whatever negative emotions lie within. If it manages to get a strong hold on you, it might be hard to shake it off later.

Don't lose sight of the goodness you have started with.... good faith, good hope, good intent, good determination, good strength... because it's the vehicle which you will ride on in getting to where you want to go or be. Continuously nurture that desire or courage to be there in the midst of life and living doing your part carving your own niche like thousands of others more are trying to do. And if you keep the spark alive -- fight to keep it there, you will see your strength rising to match it.

And you're ready for the world again.

GRATITUDE FAITH TRUST AND HOPE

Today is JANUARY 04, 2011 .......... O Lord, Bless us with simple and humble hearts to live our lives according to You. Thanks a zillion for the past year, not only for the blessings but for those times when we needed to learn some mighty essential lessons there. Help us to always understand that You only desire the best for us. Indeed you, Lord, are our Good Shepherd.

Jeremiah 29:11 --- "For I know what my plans for you are, plans to save you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and to give you hope."