Saturday, March 27, 2010


I’ve met a lot of geniuses in my life – real honest to goodness brilliant people. Okay, genius per se is a big word to use everyday. But intelligence– they’re everywhere. I have so much respect for intelligence – clever brainpower. Am not speaking of the intelligence of books or mathematical acumen but rather of the kind which leads a person to do what is right and correct at the right given time and place with real understanding, zeal and compassion. One that cuts through the mumbo-jumbo of complex facade, veneer, or pretense which people oftentimes put up in many situations but for a certain reason.

Are we getting confused there?

Okay, I sort out intelligence into two kinds – the CC (cold cerebral) and the WI (warm intellect).

The first one is behind all the brilliant inventions or creations of our times then and now and in the future yet. It establishes principles, theories, formulas, systems, doctrines, ideologies, and space flights to outer space. It writes outstanding essays, books, manuscripts, and reaps oodles of recognition which our society could ever invent for them. And they deserve it all. I won’t argue over that. They have my respect and admiration.

The second one is where I would put my last money on, if I were to choose who I’d want to be marooned with on a deserted island somewhere-nowhere on the map. And I wouldn’t even care to be found or rescued or miss the companionship of my three lovely dogs…and a lazy but cuddly cat.

Hmmm, I sense a question forming in your mind now. :-)

Let's try this.

Marooned on an island with CC may assure me of an effective make-shift shelter or a regular supply of fish caught with an intelligent contraption made out of coconut trees would probably be a creative comfy and secure stay on the island until help comes along. But I’m such a big nervous wreck when things go amiss. I cope in extremes by either nagging on the issue or shutting up keeping it all inside. Now I wonder how CC would cope with something like that.

Maybe he’s going to quote me the emotional principles contained in psychology books to explain my fears, or the possibility percentage of being found and rescued, or at worst be so angry or flare up with my irregular behavior, or scoff at my efforts to want to contribute to his plans for a rescue. Duh! he's as cold as the icy wind blowing over the island.

Let’s try WI.

The shelter would still be made though but maybe not as sophisticated as the other one and the fish will still be on our menu but sometimes we may have to do with fruits if there would be some on the island or just have to go to bed without it at all.

When at times my fears get the best of me, he would be right there beside me and be such a comforting presence, explain things in a gentle genuine manner, or engage in a story to take my mind off my fears. Or if I opt to be a recluse instead, he would try to draw me out of it with gentle coaxing or maybe even with playful humor. He’s be so much in control of himself, the situation, and even of me (which I certainly wouldn’t mind lols with a genuine fella like that).

Such an environment of down-to-earth concern (which I would think is both his brains and heart working together) would succeed to calm down my fears and effectively draw me out to reciprocate in like manner towards him too. That would certainly earn my trust and confidence in his leadership in the situation to which I’d give my full support. So the situation now becomes an ‘us’ situation – where not one or the other would serve as the protector or the one being protected – but of two people working together intelligently to solve the problem.

Now isn’t that a show of good sound healthy intelligence of the right kind?! Something that warms the heart so.

Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against brilliant minds, nope. I admire intelligence or brilliance in any person. It’s a God-given gift. But it would help if such brilliance is tempered with a more humane approach towards life and the people around you. Genius may take you to the big time, fat paychecks, top scale jobs, and the adulation of your peers – true. But what worth is all that when there is so much lack in the other areas of your life.

- When your kids see you only on birthdays, sometimes not (why can’t you find time for that but always keep tab of your boss’s anniversary?)

- When your wife can’t even discuss some important event in the family without you muttering an obviously lame excuse and leave (are things of the home so mundane for your precious time and mind?)

- When close friends can’t do lighthearted banter around you without you brushing it all off as a waste of time (do you know that some worthwhile things are not found inside the boardroom at all?)

- When your small kid comes to you with a broken toy and you instead opt to buy him an expensive intricate brand new one as replacement (do you really think that’s what he wants from you?)

Know where you should put your brilliance. Put your genius to better use with people who mean the world to you. Okay, be the brilliant person that you are to the world, but be even a better one to your family and close friends.

A man may be a genius but he can still do things
that practically break your heart. –James Q. Du Pont


It’s not all the time that I want company, or listen to the noise of endless banter, or watch the chaotic human parade of other people’s lives. It’s vexing to the mind, is wearying to the heart, and tires the soul down. It leads to confusion and troubling vibrations in the air turning my world upside down. It’s startling how all these can touch your own sphere of life and leave you so drained. But don't we all feel that way some time or another?

Sometimes … I simply want to be alone. To be there in the my own moment just being - To feel the soft breeze on my face – To feel the warmth of the sun on my skin – To hear birds chirping on the trees – To feel the waters under my feet walking by the seashore – To touch the petal of a flower – To watch the sun go down on the horizon – To let the rain touch my skin – To write my dreams on clouds of flight – To be still - To hear my heartbeat.

Sometimes I simply want to be that little child on God’s lap – to tell him about how Peter and Jane have hurt me – to ask him to make Billy the Bully a good boy so that he won’t bother me again when I walk by his house – to tell my mom and dad to please know why I cry when they leave for the office – to tell him how bad I feel because Santa Claus didn’t give me a Barbie Doll for Christmas – to ask him to make grandpa well again so that we could play – to thank him for letting Mom cook my favorite spaghetti with huge meatballs every Saturday YUMMY!

Sometimes I simply want to be with my thoughts – thinking of the past and the things it has left me with – thinking of the present and how it’s forming my tomorrows – wondering what my tomorrows will be like or when I will be finally gone.

Sometimes I simply want to be – seeing my flaws, mistakes, imperfections – seeing how fragile and vulnerable I truly am – looking at my limitations, my borders, my walls – and yet understanding that I too have my own strengths, potential, and the power to dream. That everything there, good or bad, has shaped who I am. That all that I was, is, and will be is the story of my life.

Sometimes I simply want to be here – with nothing – doing nothing – yet loving everything.

"Inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that's where you renew your springs that never dry up." - Pearl Buck (1892-1973)

Sunday, March 21, 2010


It's a lovely morning. I can see that from my window -- cloudy skies, gusty winds, the sun playing hide and seek, tree tops doing their hip swaying dance, birds chirping merrily from tree to tree, and the usual sounds of the average neighborhood of families, crying babies, cars, the smell of cooking, the whirring of washing machines, barking dogs, and TV sitcoms.

My house is quiet now -- it's a Sunday! Everybody is allowed to sleep all they can on a Sunday. I would but my internal body clock would always rouse me at seven no matter if I stayed up late the night before. So after dragging my unwilling body out of bed, I head off to the bathroom for the first routine of the day - a cool refreshing bath. That did the trick. I'm now wide awake.

Breakfast is next on the agenda. Opened the refrigerator, saw a whole yellow ripe medium-sized papaya, took it out, and cut me two slices. Would have wanted a papaya shake but that's a lot of work. So lazy me picked two small 'calamansi' from the cupboard -- because I prefer my papaya fruit with a bit of tangy flavor to it. I got that from my kiddie days when Mom would sprinkle a bit of sugar and drops of juice from the calamansi -- just so I eat my fruit. You see, as a kid I was a cake freak and why I loved birthdays because I could eat all the cake my tiny mouth could munch on. Anyway she won that battle. It tasted good with just the right balance of tangy and sweet enhancing the natural flavor of the papaya. So that stuck and I do it all the time but sans the sugar thing.

Done with breakfast, I hie off to the computer. But of course. Gmail or yahoo, checked the inboxes for new mails and possibly replying to them too. What do I get in there? Oh the usual stuff -- mail from family, friends near and far, and spam! Spam I toss out of my box without a thought - it's a reflex action actually. That settled, I clear the screen for the next thing --- writing.

Sometimes I sit at the computer blazing with an idea or ideas. And then again sometimes I sit there with a blank mind. When I have an idea churning in my brain, the writing comes easy. It just flows, 'could be long or short but that doesn't matter. Because I've found out that when the idea finally is exhausted then my fingers just stop on the keys. Yeah my brain and my fingers are connected. But there are moments when the fingers are so hyped out for typing more.. but my mind puts an abrupt halt to that with a simple snooty 'I have nothing more to say'.

Sitting at the computer with a blank mind, on the other hand, is just what it is -- a blank! No ideas, no inspiration, no motivation, nothing! But... I don't blame myself for that. Hahah I blame that on the Muses. On such a day, it tells me that the Muses are in a conference brainstorming topics or subjects for me to write. I can imagine a lively colorful ecstatic exchange between the Muses inside the boardroom. I'd do anything to be privy to that fantastic exchange. But since I can't.. then I wait out the 'tempest delight' with my own 'time killers' -- music, reading, sketching, or sew adjustments on my new dress, or play crazy with my dogs. The writing inactivity could go on for days or weeks, there is no deadline to the Muses' brainstorming sessions. They'll come to me when they're ready. And that's okay with me.

Ooops! I now hear activity in the bedrooms. So my princesses have waken from their dreams of castles in the air, a million dollar job, gorgeous fashionista clothes, a dashing prince, travels around the world, and tons of cookies-and-cream ice cream. Yup turning into Mom-mode. So bye for now. See you back here soon. :-)

Saturday, March 20, 2010


"No matter who you are, no matter where you go in life, at some point you will need somebody to stand by you."

That's a beautiful line from the song 'Stand By Me'.
If you think that you can go through life all by your lonesome independent self, think again. Because that isn't so. You can't be all those things you want to be nor do everything you think you can do. It does not work that way. In your every thought, idea, or action lies within a special need which not even you can provide for yourself. Why? Because admittedly there are things which another person's thought, idea, or action could serve perhaps better than you - like it or not.

You can't know everything there is to know, you will need a thousand lifetimes to know or learn them all. And if mistakes are the tools for learning, you can't make all the mistakes you need to do to gather those lessons. You have to learn those from others as well. You can't be the sole reservoir of talent or skills or brilliance. Others have it too in great measure. Perhaps even more than what you know.

We all stand connected in many different ways. I need you for something in my life in the same way you need me for something you have to fill to get on with life too. Whatever it is -- intellectual, social, spiritual, physical, moral, political, business, relational -- whatever it is the bottom line is we need each other at some point or another.

And when life gets tough don't we look around for something or someone who could help us get through and out in one piece? I do. I need somebody to be here or there for me. Somebody who through thick and thin would --- stand by me. That, by the way, is also by God's design.

At this point, I'd like to say 'thank you to lovely people -- my gorgeous family, steadfast friends, strangers who were angels in disguise -- who in my small life have stood by me whenever-wherever-whatever'. And to our wonderful Father up there in His Holy Throne --Hugs, Daddy! Thank you. :-)

Wednesday, March 17, 2010


A good friend online sent me this piece and it's a good one on parenting. I have retained the generic ideas on that list and left out the rest with the hope that my friend would do the honors of posting the complete text in his blog. To quote...

"Helping Your Children Like Themselves," --James Harris (1983)

1. Teach children that they are divine spirits who have the potential to become like their Father in Heaven.
2. Be positive and optimistic when children make mistakes; avoid dwelling on their weaknesses.

3. Understand each child and adapt your teaching style accordingly.

4. Teach children correct principles, but give them room to learn and grow by encouraging them to do things on their own.

5. Help your child develop self-worth by learning to serve others.
6. Spend as much time with your children as you can.
7. Teach your children how to work.

8. Teach children to see the good in other people.

9. Teach children to respect themselves and not to dwell on their shortcomings.

10. Speak and act in ways that sincerely express your love to your children.


And I know that parents everywhere hope in their hearts that they have done one or some of these in good measure. We can only do our best with our children but we can never be sure of how they will turn out. Because as they grow older they will begin to use their own free wills.

'Free will' is both a blessing and a bane, and to some a curse. But then this is how God meant it to be -- that man exercise the gift of free will to make choices hoping that man has learned well to choose good. I have always believed that god does not interfere with man's exercise of free will but is certainly quick to respond whenever invited. That is what prayer is all about.

I have, with all that I could muster, tried to raise my girls into god-anchored individuals. Because I know that there is their safety and surety as they travel their own life journeys. Beauty brilliance education titles or riches have their uses agreed but they are nothing compared to the power of our Creator. There is so much more that he can do for you which not even all of these combined can. With God nothing is impossible. Peace in the midst of chaos, clarity in confusion, help in dire need, discernment in false surroundings, decision in uncertainty, and so much more you haven't even begin to realize. All that you have to do is ask -- in prayer.

May God bless you with all these and so much more.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010


"Bringing up a family should be an adventure, not an anxious discipline in which everybody is constantly graded for performance." - (Milton R. Saperstein) ------------

Bringing up a family is an adventure yes but certainly it's not a joy ride. It's serious business. Imagine responsible for individuals brought to ...your care and nurturing until they are ripe to be on their own and tackle life at their own terms. Through that whole process you cry, sigh, laugh, fidget, sizzle with temper, tremble in fear, sulk in frustration, and everything else. And come the day that you see them off. But it does not stop there. Because all of their successes and failures are too brought back to your plate. To make you either smile or cry or despair and... do the same job all over again. That's more adventure than you could ever ask for!

Monday, March 15, 2010


I was finishing a new post when I got this piece (from Sanjeev) in my inbox. It's nothing new because I have seen it before and maybe so have you. It's been circulating around on the internet for so long. But when I saw this, a friend came to mind. Anyway, do take time to read this. :-)

One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish.

About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family. "

"You aren't going to catch many fish that way," said the businessman to the fisherman. "You should be working rather than lying on the beach!"

The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, "And what will my reward be?"

"Well, you can get bigger nets and catch more fish!" was the businessman's answer.

"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman, still smiling.

The businessman replied, "You will make money and you'll be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!"

"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman again.

The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman's questions. "You can buy a bigger boat, and hire some people to work for you!" he said.
"And then what will my reward be?" repeated the fisherman.

The businessman was getting angry. "Don't you understand? You can build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!"

Once again the fisherman asked, "And then what will my reward be?"

The businessman was red with rage and shouted at the fisherman, "Don't you understand that you can become so rich that you will never have to work for your living again! You can spend all the rest of your days sitting on this beach, looking at the sunset. You won't have a care in the world!"

The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, "And what do you think I'm doing right now....?"

--- What I think is it's not wrong to work hard for your dreams. And it's okay to enjoy the fruits of your labor too. Lols! Find your balance. And --- pay no attention to some who think you are not doing enough. They haven't yet learned that it's not kind to judge people by appearances. Could he tell that this perceived lazy fisherman was actually a billionaire just having some good clean fun? :-)

Thursday, March 11, 2010


I like birds. But I don't know how many species there are, how they live love or die. What I do know is that I love birds. Oh don't tell me bout the scary ones and there are scary ones too but I guess they too have their part in the order of things in nature.

Do birds cry? Have you seen one struggle, suffer, sad, disappointed, afraid or angry? Or work very hard? Or simply lounge back lazily and watch the sky? I haven't. Or maybe I just don't know or can't see it. But does it matter? Birds tell me many other things... things which I didn't pay much attention to or simply took for granted.

Birds tell me.....

- to have a song in my heart and let it reign in my soul
- to soar and not just fly towards my dreams
- to be one with the wind, the sun, the sky
- to enjoy the freedom of flight... no boundaries, no borders, no limits, no chains
- to like who I am and what I stand for... and it should be for good
- to see everything big and small and that everything matters in this big tapestry of life
- to trust in a Greater Being who orchestrates all living things below and above
- to act in faith that by being me I am doing what I am supposed to be doing (it's right there in the heart)
- to be always thankful for everything.....

..... and that, by the way, is what birds do when they sing. How do I know that? I don't. But every time I hear a bird sing -- I feel their joy - their peace - their gratitude. They can't seem to stop singing. (Oh others will call it chirping lols) But they seem to be endlessly grateful for many things, for everything. Maybe I should start doing that too. :-)

Friday, March 5, 2010


The previous posts have all centered on the family's Boracay grand vacation in photographs. This current post now will be a bit longer than usual (at the risk of taxing your patience and interest Lols!).... as I intend to put in a few more pictures too. So this probably will be the last segment on my Family Boracay Holiday. I hope this will make your blog visit fun.

There is something that a vacation does to a person aside of course from obviously resting his weary mind body and soul. It makes one think..... a lot. The thoughts do not center on any one thing but churns itself feverishly with every sight and sound that confronts it. Nothing goes by unnoticed... every small detail goes through close scrutiny. This in turn generates a fresh influx of new perceptions or insights. And this is good. Just learn to crack through the thin veneer of glitz, gloss, and glamor.

On that wonderful vacation with my family, the sights and the sounds of the place revved up my senses to overdrive --- the sight of a fabulous sunset, the clear pristine waters, the cool white sandy shores, the green palm trees lining the beach, the people of different colors- cultures- nationalities, the diversity of shops all aiming for your wallet, the flashy display of attractions by hotels competing with each other for patronage, the blaring sounds of music coming out from every pub and bar, the raucous celebration of every sort from different groups in different places on the ground, the aroma of a variety of both familiar and exotic dishes, the sensory thrill of a good foot massage, or meeting the popular friendly canine resident of the island resort who goes by the name of Friday, and many many more. But having my hair braided or my arm henna tattooed would totally be out of the question. That would simply look outrageous on me! As to surfboarding, diving, snorkeling, or wind surfing – that will take another vacation I guess and a good mentor.

I count family time as the greatest moment or moments of all. You can just imagine the joy and pride I felt watching my daughters enjoy this wonderful island vacation and resort. And how I enjoyed the four of us (and my future-son-in-law) on those lovely walks down the long stretch of the shore, feeling the fine white sands under our bare feet, seeking out a good place for breakfast, lunch, or dinner, gushing over a delicious scrumptious piece of cake, frolicking on the beach, or picking up seashells washed up the shore, simply lounging by the shore just looking out to a gorgeous sunset, or be one in agreement that God sure blessed us all with beautiful nature and more so in life if we only open up our jaded eyes minds and hearts, or watch them taking charge over the flight schedules and transfers to and from the island to the mainland, or riding a pedicab to church for the Sunday mass, or trek off on an ATV (All Terrain Vehicle. That was fun!) to Mt. Luho, or see their care and concern for my comfort welfare and enjoyment like I remember I once was with them when they were kids long ago. How fast time flies... how they have grown up to be lovely affectionate and responsible daughters right after a mother's heart. I count family as such a wonderful gift from God.

It is good, all good. It tells me how we all go through the same things in life whoever you are whatever you do or wherever you are from. We work ourselves maybe 24/7 to the bone but we too love the idea of a great vacation in some lovely paradise where everybody else shares your idea of rest and recreation. And that no matter which way you want to go, we still are both the same and different all in the same breath. We like and love the same things or not, we hate the same things or not, we have the same thoughts and not too. And nothing lends such clarity to that than a vacation.

Take a vacation, folks. It makes you see life, people, things, the world, God, and your family better. Essentially it gets you connected to your core and restores balance -- Something which we easily tend to lose in the busyness of our lives and living.

So here ends my family holiday in pictures. But it felt good having those wonderful moments, experiences and pictures shared with good friends. So until the next adventure... :-) ...and I hope soon. Well, as Christine says "I'll be back". And I with Amchit, Malen, and Daniel would say to that "You bet!". :-)
Ciao and God bless!!