YOU AND ME.... WE'RE THE SAME AND YET STILL SO DIFFERENT

It is so true. I can say all I want to say but there is no assurance that the other person would understand my intent very well. Undoubtedly he may come from a different emotional environment or history as mine that his perceptions would certainly differ. We may be looking at the same things but we each would have a different view or interpretation of it. That's so much what transpires in a conversation normally.

I alone am responsible for what I say. My mom would tell me long ago.. 'be careful what you wish for..' -- in the same sense I would be careful what I speak. Besides the other person may be following his own journey to learning what's right or wrong.... something which God and Life are its best teachers .... not me. Be kind to his journey.


The only assurance I can give is that I would honestly try to understand what he would be saying to me. That I shall as best as I can refrain from trying to inject my own personal perceptions (no matter if I was right or tempted to) which could inconsiderately undermine his own beliefs. Mom once asked me this ----- 'wouldn't it be sufficient to yourself to know that you are right?' That made me really think and seriously. Hard as it may be, I believe it still is the best road to take in social interactions. Although it may seem being untrue to oneself, yet it is much better to be kind than correct at most times.There is more to gain with kindness.

But on the level of true friendships which could be said as above the cut, most certainly I would be free to be me in my truest self ... trusting that I would be understood as I intend to be understood. And I would do the same in return. A mutual give-and-take intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually. That's why you're called 'friends'.

Yet on either levels as mentioned above, I believe kindness is and should still be the norm. Why aim to be always right when you know you can't be sure how the other would feel about that.  Besides if you insist, there is a kinder and nicer way to do it. There always is. Be kind anyway.

If God is so kind and patient with me, I guess I can learn to be just as kind and patient with others too.

Wonderful blessings to you and yours. Have a great day.

JUDGE NOT SO YOU BE NOT JUDGED

I don't know who said this, wasn't mentioned in the email I received. But it's sure one good quote. What it says is this ----- "You can tell more about a person by what he says about others than you can by what others say about him."

Now as I understand it we are more inclined to listen to what people say about others and from there make our own judgment about that person. I used to, that was before I learned that people are not always correct in their judgements. That includes myself. No kidding abut that.

Until on this one particular day (in high school) when I found my big BIG lesson. This friend, let's call her Patty, was singing praises about her other friend -- speaking with such high adulation about Wendy's achievements, her sweet temperament, being smart, and etc etc etc. Added that I should meet her. Okay, I was curious now to meet this person who seemed to be after my job as best friend to Patty.

So we met. Pretty, big brown eyes, long black hair, fair skin. She would stick out in a crowd indeed. And we girls talked the usual 'girl talk'. Clothes, shoes, handbags, cute boys, brownies and ice cream, monster teachers. And I sat there and listened intently to her chatter. She knew the latest fashion trends, knew almost every high school boy worth knowing, and carried on a monologue on the worst teachers she met alongside some of the girls she considered boring - bland - stupid - geeky - ugly - lousy dressers - and weird.

Then it hit me hard like a huge rock to my head --- she wasn't the girl Patty so admired after all. What came out of her mouth belied the nice smart sweet person Patty praised so highly to me. She was pretty alright.... but her mind and heart was not!

When I got back home that day I thought about Wendy. If I may have in the past sounded like her spewing out negative jibes at people and things, then the people listening to me right there would have reacted towards me so much the same as I had reacted towards Wendy. Awful, isn't it?!!

Well, to cut a long story short, this one high school girl learned one big lesson out of school that day. Sometimes the best lessons can be found outside the classroom too without the help of books.