BE OF GOOD COURAGE AND BE KIND

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Life is not all fun and stuff. You know that. I know that. We all know that. There are the times when you wished you were somewhere else... perhaps the moon or mars!? I do. Particularly when people come into my space without the slightest good intent. Oh yes, the world is made up of both the good and the bad. A famous writer (whose name I forgot now) once said that "..... a person has both the good and the bad in him and he is defined by the choices he makes".
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Okay, following that line of thinking -- then when that person who with all of his sanity and humanity chose to be mean to me -- therefore he is a bad person. On the other hand, another person who chose to be kind, sympathetic and helpful to my plight -- therefore is a good person. And then when I want to bash into smithereens the head of the bad person and reward with kindness the good person --- I am then both good and bad. Simple lang noh?!!
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But... I chose not to be bad in my responses to such situations; I wasn't raised that way. Besides I believe in a Divine Presence who sees everything and gives to every person according to what he or she deserves, both good and bad. So there!
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I have learned so much from Mom. She was all-patient, forgiving, generous, tough, resourceful, long-suffering, but of such staunch faith in her belief in the Divine whose fairness in all things can be depended upon. The results she may have expected or prayed for may have come not promptly as she hoped for but her faith always was proven right. God has His ways, in His time. I saw that in her life. I was made sad though that she didn't live long enough to see her vindication. But I was glad that God honored her faith. In all things.
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I have loved this from the first time I heard it from the movie "Cinderella" ---- "Be of good courage and be kind". That movie now is among the very top on my list of favorites.
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It reminded me of Mom... the story of her life. Courage in a tough life and kindness of a heart which knew how to understand.
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Never mind the bad people and things and stuff which come into your life. But choose your responses to it. Your responses will define who you are. And.. God sees what people may not see nor understand. That is sufficient.
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God bless you.

CHILDREN CATCH THEIR PARENTS' DNA

 

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We know about parents loving their children with all of their hearts... that we want nothing less but everything good and best for them.... that we would go through the 'highest mountains and the seven seas' (a friend loves saying this) for them --- meaning, sacrifice. And that we think we are doing just that. Of course we are but also we are doing something which we may not even be aware of .... until Mitch Albom wrote this...............
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“All parents damage their children. It cannot be helped. Youth, like pristine glass, absorbs the prints of its handlers. Some parents smudge, others crack, a few shatter childhoods completely into jagged little pieces, beyond repair.” ------- Mitch Albom,
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Sent by Mr. Quote Man (as usual) this morning as the sky begins to shift from white to gray. Gee, now I see thick clouds hiding the blue skies that I love. But as all things in life do.... this too shall pass. Now back to the quote.
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Have you come across similar quotes before or heard somebody say something like it? I think we did and do at some time or another.. but we take no heed nor pay attention because we are so darn set on our children... rather than on how we directly or indirectly influence them in not so pleasant ways, to say the least.
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It made me think tho..........
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Life has its good and bad. Everything comes in pairs, as another friend would say jokingly..... opposites, particularly. In the same way as there is day and night, joy and sorrow, beautiful and ugly, tall and short, fat and think, sunrise and sunset, smiles and tears, man and woman, young and old, sweet and bitter ... etc.
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A person has his own store or pairs of opposites, too. Both joy and sadness... strength and weakness... bravery and cowardice... intelligence and stupidity... compassion and callousness etc... as situations or circumstances roll out in everyday life. In one instance he is one and in the next moment he is the other according to what would trigger such responses in that particular moment.
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These same things come into play at work, play, career, profession, business, family, and particularly in raising children.
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Although we try as best as we can to raise them up in/with good character values, admittedly we cannot, under the same breath, be just as confident and assured that they will not also catch the negatives of who we are. Because they certainly will, no doubt. They, just as Mitch Albom says, will absorb the person that we are or what we show to them.... both the positives and the negatives of who we are. In short, they will catch our DNA.
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Remember these remarks..... "Manang-mana sa tatay yan..." "Eh ganun din ang nanay eh..."   "Like father, like son.....or like mother, like daughter" --- and that could mean either good or bad or sometimes both.
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Can it be helped? avoided? I have no answers to that.
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What I do know is............. teach your children that simple fact as mentioned in the quote ----- 'Youth, like pristine glass, absorbs the prints of its handlers.' Help them understand also much of what life is all about....... that it all boils down to making the right choices or decisions for the self and for the people we love. This works for them as it had worked for our mothers before us and their mothers before them. It's all about responsibility, accountability, focus, priority, selfless sacrifice, and love.
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Mothers need not be hindered nor should be hindered by the bad within or by the bad without. Instead set her eyes on the better good that must be served, by God's design. We, as mothers, do just like what we do with the rest of life...... give it our best shot! We try to teach them what they should be learning......... and hope to God they catch it really well.
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Then when our work is done.... we can sit back and watch as our children make something of what they have learned by also serving the bigger and better good in their own lives and in the world as well. Still by God's design.
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Blessings, everyone! May God bless all the mothers and fathers in the world.

MOM ---- THE WIND BENEATH MY WINGS

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Just a little something which crossed my mind today ......

When I was a young kid of fourteen and in school with dozens of others more of my age there was this unspoken rule among the studentry that whoever the most popular girl or boy would be on the campus was... 'it'. Meaning she or he would be up there on the pedestal of adulation and esteem... a much coveted post. 

Did that bother me? Nahh I was busy with my books (nerdy you would say) and being the nice person Mom taught me to be. Besides I was content with my share of  (so-called but not essentially important) 'adulation' and of genuine respect from people who mattered among my fellow students and teachers as well. This traveled back and forth quite so easily. Whatsoever you shall sow... so shall you reap.

I guess my mother knew all about this long before I could read and write my alphabet as she prepared me early on ... self-worth. She highlighted my talents... ballet dancing, drawing, designing dresses, writing essays .... by giving me the freedom to express myself in the genre I felt comfortable with. She gave me wings of confidence and self-worth at an early age which allowed me to soar in my mind heart and soul..... and I learned to see myself as able in my strengths and not 'disabled' in my weaknesses as I grew stronger in maturity, intellect, and abilities. She taught me to focus on strengths and at the same time understand human weaknesses and limitations, too. She said that human beings are flawed to start with but must discover their strengths and grow with that knowledge. I learned it better by the way she lived her own life on those principles she taught. These words I will never forget, she said......

.....'You don't need anybody's approval to be you. And because someone cannot see your uniqueness and worth does not mean that you don't matter at all. On the contrary, you're very special -- there's nobody else like you. Believe that because it's by God's design.'

From then on, I have used that word in all of my writings.... 'By God's design' It's etched right here in my heart forever. Thanks, Mom.

I am special... you are special. By God's design. Let nobody tell you otherwise.

Prayers for bushels of blessings to rain down upon you and your loved ones. In Christ.

A WOMAN IS LIKE A TEA BAG

Woke up with the sun way up gleefully heating up the face of the earth! But it took a back seat this time when I saw this in my inbox. Thank you, Mr. Quote Man, this one takes the prize. I'm bringing it here in memory of my mom ... a strong person, woman, daughter, wife, and mother.

To quote:

A woman is like a tea bag -- 

you never know how strong she is 

until she gets in hot water.' 

 

--  Eleanor Roosevelt

Unquote.

True, isn't it? And she is right here in our homes, our family circles, our close friends, and even out there on the streets of our big cities or in the far-flung areas of our rural landscape. But it's not always in the huge life drama or battles thrown their way that they shine. It's also in the silent struggles of their mundane battles of life and living day after day... disappointments, frustrations, heartbreaks, broken dreams.... We have a lot of them around us. You will know them when you see them because something within will resonate with that felt or shared in the heart.

 

 

THE WEDDING DAY - (View From A Mother's Eyes) --- " YOU DON'T FIND LOVE, IT FINDS YOU"

Christine with her dolls - 1983

With elder sister, Amchit (L) and younger sister, Malen (R)

With her Mom (L) and the three sisters - apples of their mother's eyes.

And here she is now, Christine: "You don't find love, it finds you." (Excerpt from her wedding vows)












The groom - Daniel C. Salapong













The reception at the North Forbes Pavilion with family, friends, and guests.




The godparents (L) Fr. Tanseco (R)



The couple's wedding dance, with the proud mother/happy mother-in-law looking on.




Enjoying a light moment




Groom serenading his lovely bride



Daniel and Christine thanking everyone who in every special way have helped create the day's wonderful memories -- precious memories to last a lifetime.

Sisters' one quick pose before wrapping things up... a magical night!

Back at the hotel so tired - exhausted - HAPPY!!











"Forever and Longer"

Yes, my story ends here but nope, this is not the end but the beginning for them.. for my Christine. If I may say something....

Dear Daniel and Christine,

Marriage is a lot of things to many different people but what it is is this --- A marriage is defined by what you do or not do with it.. as individuals and together as husband and wife. A marriage is learning from each other -- is taking care of each other -- is being each other's best friend -- is loving each other with heart mind and soul -- is living an honestly truthfully shared life. To get the best out of marriage, you give it your best no matter what, inspite of, regardless. The challenges are many but you work at it because it deserves no less from you. And when at times you feel you have lost your strength, get down on your knees and be strengthened by HIM who alone truly loves you beyond measure. God listens with His heart and never fails -- All you have to do is pray. Remember too that a little bit of fun and laughter won't harm, in fact it softens the rough edges of a mundane life. You may be creating a new world of your own now, yet you cannot isolate yourself from the rest of the world, family, friends, people, and life. You bring it all together where you can and where you should.

I pray for you Christine and Daniel -- May God pour out His grace, light, peace, and love upon you both and may your marriage be twice as blessed with joy, happiness, peace, health, abundance, faith, laughter.

Love you... forever and longer,
Mom




(Sincere thanks for some of the photographs used in the blog to: Malen A. Santos Diaz, Alan K. Santos Diaz, Jason Magbanua, Joahn Mari Callao, Min Lopez-Pozas, Cors Fernandez, Mary Alix, Jessica T. Cruz, and our old reliable digital camera alternating with the new digicam sent by Sonia Torredes Miller. Thanks everyone and God bless.)