Tuesday, October 30, 2007

WALK BESIDE ME AND BE MY FRIEND



Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow.Don't walk behind me; I may not lead.
Just walk beside me and be my friend.
-Albert Camus
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Let me tell you this tiny story.

Things were getting into high gear as teachers and students alike were preparing for the big day. Yet Mari was sitting by myself in the auditorium staring into space away from it all, her friends were out on the campus grounds rehearsing. Her mind was set on not joining in the graduation rites the following week as she didn’t know if she could get over her disappointment thus she chose to be alone in her misery.

‘Penny for your thoughts’ Bernie spoke as she plopped down beside Mari who didn’t see her coming. Bernie was short for Bernadette. Mari didn’t reply nor looked at her.

‘I know how you feel.’ She continued. ‘Okay, He cheated in the finals; everybody knows that. And the teachers unfairly and wrongfully, out of respect for their colleague, his father, looked the other way. Apparently it was his dad who leaked out the paper. And now his son the jerk is declared valedictorian, a prize which belongs to you. Our friends know that too.’

‘But you know what -- he’ll always be cheating for the rest of his life. That makes him one big loser no matter how you look at it. While you if you beat this will be moving on to bigger challenges and will beat it just as well with flying colors. That makes you a winner in every aspect of life’s game. That sure is unbeatable in anybody’s book, especially in mine!’ and she smiled her usual lopsided smile.
‘C’mon, let’s join the practice - ‘Will race yah!’
 
Mari wiped her tears, jumped up, and ran after her chum. ‘Not if I beat you first!!!’

End of story.
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We get many kinds of friends in our lifetime – irregular friend, occasional friend, absentee friend, fair weather friend, business friend, college friend, career friend, professional friend, online friend, and many more. Friends too may be simply passing through, stay awhile, be fleeting, or perhaps remain with us much longer but definitely they can’t stay on forever. All these affect us in many different ways. Friends undoubtedly shape our lives and our responses to it by their mere presence. Some wield influence too making our lives better or worse by it.

Many summers come and go along with people who have filled it with joy, fun, and laughter. But almost all of them have faded away with the years, hasn’t it? Not by anyone’s fault but simply because that’s the way life is. Everything comes and goes just like time does.

I value friends and friendships. I do not belittle every effort big or small by anyone. Such effort, I believe, is a display of character and soul. The fact that a person goes outside of himself to offer his hand in friendship is truly incredible. It is a selfless gesture or act because he thinks nothing of the possibility of being ignored or rejected or snubbed. That possibility is real, you know. Many of us sometimes don’t know how to handle friendships or its offer. I could guess that maybe it’s the fear of getting so close to a person – the fear of having a stranger get to know you better, flaws and all – the fear of getting hurt by failed expectations, yours and the other person’s -- the fear of baring your soul to another.

But if we dwell on those fears, we will indisputably miss out on a lot of good things which real genuine friendship can bring – the courage strength hope and inspiration lent us to carry on through life’s trials, the beauty of nature and life which a friend would point out to us and which we would have missed if he didn’t, the fun and camaraderie of togetherness, the dogged loyalty to stand by you through thick and thin against popular opinion, his wisdom in speaking up when needed or in keeping his mouth shut when all that you need is affection and comfort. Such are the treasures and tons more (others could add to that list) which good friendships can undeniably bring.

Come, won’t you walk beside me and be my friend. :-)

15 comments:

  1. Hi Ellen,

    This is clearly unfair.. How can u post such wonderful and long posts at such an amazing speed.. I have a lot of catching up to do.. :D:D:D

    I am amazed at ur creative skills!!!

    A humble request.. but may be worthwhile..

    Your blog is truly a collection of pearls and i am sure you want to share your wealth of wisdom with us.. Please give us poor souls some time to absorb all the wonderful stuff you come up with.. i m sure it would change the lives of many and they would end up with lot of good wishes and blessings for you, which are anyways there for u frm ur friends and readers..

    Hope you would agree with me.. but i leave the decision to u!!

    Absolutely Beautiful words!!

    Take Care :)

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  3. Hi Ellen! Your new blog looks great :-) Hope you will still drop into o3 sometimes

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  5. welcome to BLOGGER, ELLEN...
    lets walk side by side as friends...
    lovely post...
    take care n have fun!

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  7. Hi Ellen,

    This was lovely post indeed...
    You spoke my feelings...
    As you have mentioned in the blog,I missed one of lovely friends as I didnt know how to handle friendship.
    I succumbed to the fear of another person knowing my flaws...and fear of getting hurt by failed expectations.

    Cos of this fear I lost the beautiful bonding we shared earlier, now its become more formal.

    I hope not to repeat my mistake...

    This was really good post ellen..
    It welled my eyes...
    see you on your next post...
    take care...

    Love,
    Chunks

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  9. Nice blog! very insightful and well worded. I love that quote!
    Blessings!

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  11. It's always wonderful to see my friend Kamesh! :-)

    It is such a delight that you found time off your busy sked to come here, Kamesh, -- that's fantastic!!

    :-D Oh gee, was I going too fast?? lol

    Yeahhh, I guess so; lols but there is something about 'inspiration' when it comes -- it doesn't wait to be written, it has to be written! The past week found me with a dozen of inspired thoughts which came tumbling out and refused to be reigned in. :-) So it got me feverishly typing on the computer one piece after another. :-) Can't lose the moment lol! I'm sure you will agree to that.

    In contrast to it, there too are days when the writing is dry and zero. You should see me looking so silly with pen poised in hand on the pad and trying to write.. but it just went 'freeze'. :-D

    Oh okay, I will apply the brakes to the writing but no promises. :-) hahahhah... cos I can't tell when inspiration would hit again!

    Do take care. And don't forget to stop awhile for a lovely sunset. God bless you! :-)

    Wednesday, October 31, 2007
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    Hi Ria! But of course I will - I got you and the rest of the guys there. That's why I've included a link back to it on this my new place. :-) Hey, thanks for dropping by. Take care always. God bless you and your dear ones.

    Thursday, November 01, 2007
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    Amit! what a lovely surprise. :-)
    How is everything at your end? I suppose you'd be working at design projects which I can see that you do very well. You showed me pictures of your work, remember? They were very good.

    You take care too.
    God bless you and your loved ones.

    Thursday, November 01, 2007
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    Hi Chunks,

    I have those same fears too, my friend. It sure isn't easy discarding it and baring our souls to a complete stranger, to start with. But.. we must learn and be willing to take risks and leave the safety of our cocoons. So much more can be achieved with people, especially with good friends around us.

    You know, our hearts are fragile and break easily -- it's made that way. The purpose is that in knowing how fragile feelings are we would then take extra care with each other... and not go about inflicting pain and hurt to anyone in our path whenever we want.

    The only trouble lies in some people who forget about that. Don't be afraid of them but rather try to understand them instead. Therein lies your power over them. They can't hurt you ..when you won't let them. You have the edge because you know and understand better than they could understand their own selves.

    And do not let your own flaws or imperfection stand in the way of your pursuits, generally speaking. Nobody is perfect, but you are a work in progress. Be glad of that. You give to the world from what you are and what you have.... the world must in turn receive honestly what you have to offer. Friends who cannot or do not understand that --- are not worth having at all.

    Take care, my friend. Thanks for dropping by. Am delighted by your visit. Say hello to your friend for me. Hope you guys are fine and well. Stay happy! :-) God bless you.

    Friday, November 02, 2007
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    Hi Regina,

    Welcome to my place! :-) 'Hope you enjoyed your stay. Thank you for your message which is so appreciated.

    May God bless you and your family.

    Saturday, November 03, 2007

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  12. Hi Friends,

    Oh don't be concerned bout 'deleted comments' there -- those were all my replies to you. Due to the restrictions in display mode, I decided to compile my replies in one message, so that it would be counted as only one message from me instead of separately. I would rather that all your messages show instead of mine.

    Thanks. God bless! :-)

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  13. Hi Ellen,

    I will take Micho by my side!..:P

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  14. Hi Ellen,
    Thanks for visiting my blog! And thank you for the very kind words. I love the over feel of my blog and had hoped that I was conveying it to others as a blog of peace, love, happiness, friends and family.
    Thanks again for stopping by, come again sometime!
    By the way I love the pictures on your blog!
    Blessings!

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  15. LP! this is a wonderful surprise. :-) lol oh no, Miko and everything that he stands for in our household is all mine hahahah..! He may be a lazy bum but sooo adorable it melts my heart. :-D So find yourself another Miko heheh!
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    Hi Regina,

    You have succeeded in your intent - your blog exudes friendly warmth and peace. :-) Oh yes, will be dropping by everytime am online. So see you around! Take care. God bless you and your family.

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:-) Here's where I warmly welcome you and where you leave your footprints behind with fond memories attached to it of wonderful chats and friendships. Thank you for your comments. Or send your comments to ellen622@gmail.com. Will be seeing you in your blog too. God bless you!