Monday, December 6, 2010


My best friends and I got together for lunch like we always do each month. Oh it's the usual updates and chit-chat ladies do when they come together... family, children, home, and work. Well, one still holds on to a 9-5 job. Sez she's not ready for retirement yet.. at least not for another year or two. Anyway we talk about anything and everything.. people, things, events, the world and life.

Marie, that's not her real name, is the internet freak.. blogs, emails, chats, and does her research work online too. She's got about 300 people on her network list. How she connects with all 300 makes me wonder. But this time she was complaining because some on her friends list have left without even saying bye. They just disappeared. And she's beginning to wonder if it's her fault or something. Then all eyes were suddenly on me. "What??" I said. Gina spoke "Well, you're the one with more history with your blog.." "And so?" I countered. But they looked at me even more intensely. You know when the ladies do that, you just got to give in or eat your chocolate mousse elsewhere.

"Okay. Just because you have 300 or more people on your friends list does not necessarily mean that everybody's your friend... if friends like you and me is what you mean. But it does mean that 300 people like what you're doing with your online page.... your profile, photos, stuff you write. And the interaction that follows it becomes such a joy.

But as much as you may want to keep them forever, you can't. Life won't let you. Because in the same strange ways that life brings people or strangers together... it also can take them apart. Most times not through their own fault or liking but rather because life has other things in store for them.

Life and living is constant movement, motion, change, and journey sparing no one. We might like to be at that one place and time forever as we savor its moment in our lives, but that's not what it's all about. Time moves on and we must move on along with it. Families grow, friendships transform, people and fortunes change, priorities continually shifting, babies are born - old people die, everything happens when it happens.

So the 300 on your friends list will continually be shifting and moving... some towards you and then some away from you. What a wise man once said, in essence it went this way, that....

People come into your life in many different ways....

-- some will come to you, stay for awhile, and leave
-- others will come perhaps stay longer than long
-- then several will simply be passing through
-- and then again several will come, leave, and never return

True, isn't it? Don't despair, It's not about you. They have their reasons. Trust life to hand it out to them. It's the same old story told repeatedly from one person to another, online or in real time. But you know what, nothing can quite compare with it.... people when they come into your life enrich your life. Never mind if it's just for awhile. Enjoy and cherish it while it lasts. It's still a precious gift and is there for a definite reason -- to help you become the person you were meant to be. It often works both ways ... that too is by God's design."

"Okay, anymore questions, ladies??" as I looked at their intent faces poised round the table.

"Yeah. How bout a toast to friends and friendships!!" says Marie. Happily in the midst of laughter coffee cups came together unanimously for the rousing toast. By the way, the chocolate mousse was simply divine!!


  1. Wonderful tribute to friendship!

    I envy you 4 having such lovely people to share ur life with. And Yes! People come and go as they please or as life takes them but they leave something behind. Its 4 us to decide to use it to become a better person.

    A toast to friendship..CHEERS !!!!

  2. very true
    people come and people go
    but most of them leave an imprint
    in our hearts and lives...that helps us a lot in going ahead
    nice tribute to friendship

  3. Hi Mini! Yeah, and that something they leave behind is etched right here in the heart. Thanks for dropping by. Missed you, dear friend. Blessings to you and your family.

  4. Hi Lakshmi! So nice to see you, my friend. Thanks for your wonderful insight on the subject. May God bless you and your family.

  5. Hey Ellen, It was a very meaningful post for me, for last year or so I've been struggling to forget some one and move on, but fail every time. felt so good reading your post today, it had some of the answers in it for me.

    Thank a lot.
    Bless You!

  6. You are so right! As in life, bloggy friends come and go.

    ~Ron :-)

  7. Hey Ellen,
    very wonderfully put. Its true, sometimes life dosen't really turn out the way you planned it to. Same is true with keeping in touch. You tend to get busy, your priorities change and you may or may not be able to hang out with old friends everyday. But i guess true friends are those who understand this aspect and just let you be. Cos ultimately its the friendship, the time spent that matters. Keeping in touch, inspite of the mushrooming of social networking sites is still quite subjective.
    I had a great gang of friends four years back in my engineering school. But everyone dispersed in different areas to follow their dreams, and although we donot chat everyday like we used to, we still know what is up with everyone else. And that i feel is the best part about friendships, you always are in touch via your network of friends. When we meet up, hardly any1 cribs about the fact that hw we are not in regular touch anymore, cos we all have accepted this fact at some level that our golden years are behind us, we are busy with different things. But it is always great fun to be your old self with these guys.
    As far as friends on social networking sites go, well it will be foolish to consider that all of the 300 ppl on your list are your "friends" in the traditional sense of the term. Cos you hardly interact with not more than a third of those ppl. There is only so much bandwidth you have and its you who decides who gets how much. Same is true for the rest.
    So like you said, its more important to be in the moment and enjoy the time you spend with your friends, than rue the fact that how we are not so close anymore. Friendships are beautiful because there ideally isnt any burden of expectations.
    Take Care

  8. Hi there, Aby! I was wondering when you'd come here again. Lols! How's life? Hey, thanks for taking time to drop by and for your wonderful message. Blessings to you!

  9. Hello Ron! Oh so true, don't we all know that?!! But then it's such a treasure of wonderful moments with wonderful people. :-) Thanks for coming by. Blessings to you and your family.

  10. Hi TD23! This is true... "..But i guess true friends are those who understand this aspect and just let you be. Cos ultimately its the friendship, the time spent that matters. Keeping in touch, inspite of the mushrooming of social networking sites is still quite subjective .."

    Great to see you and thanks for sharing your insight on the subject. Have a nice weekend coming up ahead. God bless you and your family.


:-) Here's where I warmly welcome you and where you leave your footprints behind with fond memories attached to it of wonderful chats and friendships. Thank you for your comments. Or send your comments to Will be seeing you in your blog too. God bless you!