Thursday, April 14, 2011


I said this to my friend who was hurting from a breakup... "Find the good in goodbye." "That real?" she asked. "Yea, why shouldn't it not be??!" I replied.

Oh I know what you're going to say next... that it hurts, that you can't imagine the pain, that it was my life! Oh but I know that too.

We all have said our goodbyes and have been said goodbye to at some point or another. And we cried, got furiously mad, broke some glasses or punched pillows, went wallowing in self-pity (now that is pitiful!), and moaned in desperation (that is even more eeooyyywww.. Nothing can be that hopeless!) We all did that and some are right now.

Goodbye is a word we'd rather not hear especially when we're feeling top of the hill, gliding on cloud 9, or riding the crest of happiness. We just feel that this could go on and on -- we just don't want it to end. But as usual life is what it is --- things do come to an end, like it or not.

Goodbye is made up of two words.... good and bye. The thing is we keep focusing on the last part of it... the 'bye'. The End. That's the one that gets through to us and hits us like a ten-inch brick wall. It breaks us. We hurt.

So how do we cope with that? Simple. Let's try something else. If you know why goodbyes are being said, you're half way there to being its survivor. Like this...

-- goodbye to that two-timing jerk out of your life
-- goodbye to overstaying relatives cos they were messing up your room all the time
-- goodbye to a friend who was hitting you in the back anyway
-- goodbye to an abusive father or husband
-- goodbye to bad memories that keep holding you back
-- goodbye to that company who can't learn how to treat their employees right
-- and etc etc etc...

Because the good in goodbye tells you that --- be glad that things happened as they did or you wouldn't have known your own strength or saw the naked truth... or acquire the faith that so pleases our God.

So the next time someone says goodbye to you or that you should say goodbye to someone .... find the good in that goodbye. With understanding comes healing. Healing allows you to move on with your life.


  1. Well it takes a lot of courage I suppose, but well said :-)

  2. I have found the "good" in goodbye several times over the years, never articulated it as well as you did though!

  3. I agree with you.But some good byes caused by minor misunderstanding or by words spoken in anger or jest and never meant or machinations of mischievous persons are difficult to accept and cause considerable anguish

  4. It does, Raaji, but it's worth the try. Anything to improve our lives would be worth trying. Thanks for dropping by. Blessings to you and your family.

  5. That's wonderful, Theanne. It's WOW! :-) Hey so nice to see you. Hope your day is lovely and thanks for coming by. Bless you!

  6. Thanks for dropping by, KP. May God bless you and your family.

  7. Hi Ellen,
    this posts reminds me a quote i read long time back..

    Goodbye is a little word
    That causes more Pain.
    The hand that you held now
    Might never meet you again!

    Nice read Ellen..

  8. Ellen,

    Switched to Google Chrome to visit. Very practical advice. There is no happiness in clinging to bad relationship of any form. For own good one must say GOOD BYE.

    Take care

  9. I like that quote, Prams. Very much. Because it's so true. Have lost many good friends through goodbyes. But I try to be consoled by the fact that the friendship while it lasted brought priceless joy and lovely memories.

    Thanks for sharing and for coming by.
    Take care always. God bless you and your loved ones.

  10. Glad that you finally made it here, Jack. Thanks. It's always a pleasure to see you visiting with your usual sharing and wisdom. Blessings to you and your family.

  11. Awesome .... u have related so well it gets easy to face the truth!

  12. Awww, Pearl, truth is easy when we decide that we want to see it. The way You see with your heart. :-)

    Bless you.

  13. That's a well-thought out post. I always saw goodbye as one bad, sad thing, but there is also something nice to it.

  14. Like you, Indra, I once thought goodbyes were a sorry-feel bad thing. Now I've learned better that indeed we can extract some positive thoughts or wisdom from a negative experience. It's like someone smart once said... 'when life hands you lemons, make a lemonade!' :-)

    Cheers and God bless.


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